


The (Werewolf) Sex Talk

by amusewithaview



Series: Kinkmeme Fills [3]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Allison is a Disney Princess, Awkward Conversations, Awkward Sexual Situations, F/M, I would do anything for love, Knotting, Stiles is a researching BAMF, The (Werewolf) Sex Talk, because he's the bestest friend a wereboy could have, but I won't do that, except Stiles WILL 'do that'
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-30
Updated: 2012-07-30
Packaged: 2017-11-11 02:08:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/473283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amusewithaview/pseuds/amusewithaview
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Stiles,” Allison asked, a faintly perplexed look on her face, “what's 'knotting?'”</p>
            </blockquote>





	The (Werewolf) Sex Talk

**Author's Note:**

> Fill for the following kinkmeme prompt:
> 
> _"What is knotting?"_
> 
> _I, as the prompter, haven't dared to google it yet but after reading a few fics, I have a vague idea. I still don't know in detail, though._
> 
> _And I bet that few of the characters of Teen Wolf knew at first, either. So, I want a fic where they (any of them, all of them, whatever really!) find out what it means ... because, you know, it's starting to be relevant to their interests, or something. Who tells them, HOW to they tell them, how do they find out? (I'm thinking Stiles, for example, isn't too afraid to google it, and not to shy to tell anyone else about what it means either ...)_
> 
> _Make it cracky, cringe-worthy, funny, serious, whatever you like - but please, informative! :D_
> 
>  
> 
> Not super-informative, I went more for humor. Might do an additional chapter where _Lydia_ learns what it is... and since Lydia has Mad Research Skillz and _no shame_ , her 'talk' would be far more informative, and far more blush-inducing.
> 
> TIMELINE NOTE: this takes place in some nebulous post-season one place where Jackson became a werewolf, the Argents are 75% less crazy, and Lydia woke up human(ish). So, Derek is the alpha, Scott and Jackson are betas... and I may have implied that someone else is about to be bitten.

He should have known that something was up when Allison entered the lunchroom alone. Unfortunately, he was distracted by the unmitigated glory that was Lydia's hair in the sunlight, so he missed seeing the brunette's entrance into the cafeteria. He didn't notice Scott's unusual absence (seriously, he was practically _stitched_ to Allison's side during school hours) until she set her tray down across from him.

“Stiles,” Allison asked, a faintly perplexed look on her face, “what's 'knotting?'”

He immediately choked on his soda, a little dribbling down his chin. “You're – ah – you're kidding, right?”

“No, I'm not. I don't know what it is, but I overheard Scott talking to Derek about it a few days ago, and when I asked _him_ , he told me to ask _you_ ,” she pursed her lips, obviously frustrated, “so now I'm here, asking you.” She looked at him expectantly, “What is it?”

Stiles stared at her, mouth opening and closing a few times, “I... seriously, Allison, I cannot have this conversation with you. There – it's - _no_ , I will do many, _many_ things in the name of friendship - Scott and I actually wrote out a _list_ when we were eight because we thought it would be funny, and, you know, Meatloaf – but this? This is _not on that list_ and there's just no way. _None_.”

Allison rolled her eyes, “Fine. I'll just google it or something.”

“No, _NO!_ You can't -” Stiles shut his eyes, muttering to himself for a minute. When he opened them, nothing had changed: he was still looking at his best friend's insanely sweet, ridiculously _innocent-looking_ girlfriend (she was a real-life _Disney princess_ , she even had an animal sidekick! Granted, that sidekick was her boyfriend, but if it worked for Belle – oh, god, _no_ , that way led to bad thoughts about Beast fanfiction and... Stiles really needed to find a way to shut his brain off).

Instead, he gave her his most earnest look, one well-practiced from use on lawmen across the county, “Look, this is just a thing that, for the sake of everyone, I am going to have to ask you to drop. It's – you...” he wrinkled his nose, trying desperately not to allow the thoughts of _Allison_ and _sex_ and, oh god, _knotting_ to combine in his head, “just, yeah...”

She quirked a brow at him, “And yet my curiosity is still aroused -” Stiles winced, “and I still have no answers.” She frowned thoughtfully, “Should I ask my parents?”

“What?! No!” Stiles paused, “Well, not unless you actually _want_ a wolf-skinned rug.”

“So it's a sex thing,” Allison concluded triumphantly.

He slumped in his seat, poking at the mystery meat, “Yes, Allison, it's a sex thing. A _werewolf_ sex thing.”

“Scott and I haven't... I mean we probably _will_ , we just _haven't_ – yet.” Allison let out an uncomfortable laugh, “This is awkward, _wow_ , this is awkward. I'm going to – to stop asking you questions and just prepare my googling skills. I mean, wikipedia has to have some useful links at least, right?”

Stiles shook his head mournfully.

“...and I'm guessing this isn't something I'll be able to learn about with safe search on?”

Stiles shook his head again, looking distinctly ill.

Allison nodded, “Okay then, I guess I'll... muddle through?”

This time Stiles _flinched_.

“You're not exactly leaving me many options, here, Stiles. Should I ask Derek?” she suggested, a bit timid mentioning the man whose _entire family_ had been murdered by her crazy aunt. The man she'd _shot twice_ , though she _had_ apologized for it, later. The man who was only now starting to warm up to her during their bi-weekly pack and 'people in the know' meetings.

“No, you should _definitely not_ ask Derek. Or Jackson,” Stiles added for good measure. “Lydia would totally know, if she, you know, _knew_ ,” he couldn't help a quick, surreptitious look over at the redhead, who was currently holding court with the rest of the pretty people. Jackson wasn't in school today, but then neither was Danny – Stiles had no idea why, but he was grateful that he wouldn't have to deal with the blonde's snide comments while he gave Allison the werewolf-sex talk.

Allison was starting to look worried, “If this is something that I need to know -”

“It is. If sex is on the table, then it really, _really_ is. I... I will bring you a packet. Of information. _Tomorrow_ , okay? And I will sit with you in the library while you read it and answer any questions you have, if I can, and then I will _burn_ said packet and you and I will _never speak of this again_.”

She nodded, wide-eyed, and the rest of lunch passed in twitchy (on his part), stressful (on hers) silence.

…

**YOU ARE AN ASSHOLE.**

**she needs to know**

**HATE. SO MUCH HATE. ALL OF MY HATE.**

**I can't tell her! it would be weird**

**AND ME GIVING YOUR GIRLFRIEND THE WEREWOLF SEX TALK ISN'T WEIRD?!?!**

**point**

**You owe me. SO much.**

**ur a good friend :-)**

…

Stiles was waiting in the library, fidgeting so hard that the table he had settled at was rattling just a little.

Allison approached him with trepidation, wide eyes taking in his disheveled apearance.

“Here,” he tossed her a manilla folder, “everything you ever wanted to know about _Bulbus Glandis_.”

She took the packet, opened it, and began to read.

Stiles watched her eyes get steadily wider and wider.

“So, um,” she swallowed, “he has a, uh - ”

“Yep.”

“And this will happen _every time_ we, ah - ”

“Pretty much.”

“And it's a, um, a _mating thing?_ ” she squeaked.

“Yes.”

“I am _not_ ready for pup - _babies_ ,” she said emphatically, slapping the folder shut.

“That's... probably for the best. And something you should discuss with Scott.”

“Oh, I will. Believe me, I will.”

“If it helps, I think that condoms might - ”

“Stop! Just stop. Thank you Stiles, you have really gone above and beyond the call of friendship, but I think this is something I should figure out on my own from here on out,” she favored him with a bright, genuine smile, the kind that left Scott twitterpated (there was _no other word_ that could accurately describe the nauseating level of infatuation his friend displayed) for hours, but just gave Stiles a warm feeling.

Her smiles were like Stilinski hugs: _awesome_.

“You're welcome, Allison.” He smiled, “Now, let's never speak of this again. _Ever_.”


End file.
